Greens’ ‘tweeter-in-chief’ fails to get himself share of spoils!

By Archon Saturday March 13th, 2010

HERE’S something to chew on: Within days of Dan Boyle’s famous twittering that led to the resignation of Defence Minister Willie O'Dea, the unelected Green senator was at it again – only this time his manic musings were not picked up.

So, here’s what he said. Having commented that he had offered his resignation as party spokesperson during Willie’s brothel problems, he added that it was now more than likely that he (Boyle) would be getting a promotion.

Yes, a promotion. “I’m expecting an announcement on greater public and Oireachtas involvement,” he breathlessly wrote.

For the cognoscenti - those who avidly digest every word of the Leeside twitterer - it could mean only one thing. The Biffo was at last recognising the talented Mr Boyle and was ready to pluck him from the bowels of Senate obscurity, where he represented nobody, and plunge him into government as, wait for it, a Junior Minister!

These were no Napoleonic delusions on Mr Boyle's part. We all knew that one day he would ascend into a political heaven, and that it was not contrary to the Constitution for a senator to hold a cabinet portfolio. It was very rare, of course, for something like that to happen in Irish politics. On the other hand, Mr Boyle was a very rare politico.



CROP ROTATION

Dan’s trailblazing twittering was a prelude to the farce that took place last week. Shortly after announcing the possibility of ‘greater Oireachtas involvement’ for himself, TV3 reported the existence of a secret agreement that the Greens had negotiated when entering government with Bertie Ahern in 2007.

The secret pact guaranteed a rotation of Green government ministries and, significantly, the creation of a new junior ministry. The details were the following: at about half way through the life of the government, two of the Greens’ three ministries would be rotated.

Ciaran Cuffe would substitute Gormley as Minister for the Environment, Heritage and Local Government and Mary White would step into the Ministry for State in the Department of Agriculture. Eamonn Ryan, as Minister for Communications, Energy and Natural Resources, would remain where he was. The icing on the cake was the promise of an extra Junior Minister.

Hence (dare we say it?), Dan’s twittering annunciation of great gifts descending upon his noble head! Was he not telling us in mystic language that since the Final Secret of Fatima was now out in the open he, the anointed one, would step forward to be crowned Junior Minister of all Ireland? Well, not exactly of all Ireland, but certainly of Batto’s Education brief.

Dan, however, failed to take into consideration an important reality. The country was aghast that Fianna Fail and the Greens had cobbled together such a sordid wheeze. Rightly or wrongly, the pact was interpreted as nothing more than a ‘jobs for the boys (and girls)’ scam and, worse still, the story broke on the back of three weeks of Green political turmoil.



GREEN SNARLIN

The Greens did not deny the existence of the rotation pact. The ‘tweeter-in-chief’ argued on RTE’s Morning Ireland that divvying up ministerial functions - sharing the spoils in other words - was not a bad thing. He said it prevented corruption!

And, in an interview with the local press, Dan said he was confident the Green Party would be given a second junior ministry in the upcoming cabinet reshuffle.

As far as the punters in Cork were concerned, Dan was going to be That Lucky Man in spite of the fact that the 2007 deal was with Bertie, whereas the current ruler of the roost was Biffo, a Taoiseach forced by a public outcry to reduce the high number of junior ministers from 20 to 15.

On top of that, Fianna Fail rank and file was bubbling with rage over the possibility of a second junior post for the Greenies, particularly since the tree-huggers had earlier been so vociferous in calling for a reduction in junior ministers.

Whatever about Fianna Fail fury, once the details were out in the open it wasn’t long before the Greenies were snarling. For instance, in an interview with the ‘Oirish’ Daily Mail, the “F-off” deputy, Paul Gogarty, put down a serious marker with the comment: “if there was to be an extra junior ministry, it would be in the education area and that would have been tailor-made for me.”

On top of that, Gormley made it crystal clear that he had no intention of standing down – deal or no deal! So much so, that towards the end of last week, Boyle twittered rather blithely that he was not aware of any imminent departures.

“As far as I know, John has no intention of stepping down,” he wrote. That was followed by: “Look, it’s speculation. As leader, John decides when or if he is to leave cabinet. Could be tomorrow, could be two years time.”

Having lurched crazily through the week, the Green Party finally agreed to leave all critical decisions on the forthcoming cabinet reshuffle to Gormley. The rotating minister idea was left to whirl off into space, but the additional Junior Minister stroke remained a runner.



JIGGERY POKERY

The Green ‘gissa job’ secret deal was a public relations disaster. Sinn Fein described it as a comedy in the style of ‘Lanigan’s Ball.’ How refreshing, they observed, to note that there was finally a concern within the Greens about jobs – their own! The paragons of virtue had been exposed as shams, as ready as any of the buckos in Fianna Fail to indulge in cronyism.

For former Senator Deirdre de Burca, the debacle presented her with a metaphorical cowpat to hurl at the leadership. She described Gormley and crew as ‘paralysed by an attachment to political office.’

Let’s not forget, however, that Ms de Burca resigned from the Seanad last month over the very important ‘gissa job’ principle: Gormley’s failure to secure her a position in the cabinet of Ireland’s European Commissioner, Maire Geoghegan-Quinn!

The ‘jobs for the boys (and girls)’ syndrome that now threatens to destroy what’s left of bedraggled Green principles has a deeper resonance for Dan Boyle. He cannot but remember that last January The Irish Times suggested that Fianna Fail wanted to nominate him for a plum job in the European Court of Auditors.

Sadly, there was no substance to the story. It turned out to be a cruel joke played on Dan, another example of Fianna Fail’s caustic sense of humour and just like Don Berto’ jiggery-pokery concerning that extra Junior Minister!